Facing Your Writer Fears

Writing a memoir is one of the most courageous things you can do. You’re not just telling a story—you’re telling your story, with all its raw, messy, beautiful truths. And if that feels terrifying, you’re not alone.

Every memoirist I’ve ever worked with has faced fear in some form. Fear of what others will think. Fear of getting it wrong. Fear of not being good enough.

If you’ve ever felt frozen by fear, staring at a blank page, wondering if you’re even allowed to write your story, I want you to take a deep breath. Because fear isn’t a stop sign. It’s a sign that you’re doing something important.

Why Fear Shows Up When You Write

Fear is wired into us for survival. Our ancestors needed to be hyper-aware of danger—scanning for threats, avoiding rejection from their tribe, staying safe. Today, we’re not being chased by lions, but our brain still scans for threats, and writing about our lives can feel like a big one.

What if people judge me?
What if I remember it wrong?
What if my words hurt someone?

Fear is normal. But it doesn’t have to be in charge.

The 5 Most Common Fears Memoir Writers Face

Let’s talk about the big ones. Because when we name our fears, they start to lose their grip.

1. Fear of Judgment or Criticism

What if people don’t like my story?
What if my family thinks I’m selfish for writing about my life?

This fear often comes from our deep-rooted need to belong. The truth is, your story won’t be for everyone—and that’s okay. No book is. What matters is writing for the people who need to hear it.

2. Fear of Hurting Others or Damaging Relationships

What if my story offends or hurts someone I love?
How do I tell my truth without making others the villains?

This is one of the biggest struggles memoirists face. Telling your truth doesn’t mean you have to tell it cruelly. There are ways to write with both honesty and compassion—holding space for both your experience and the humanity of others.

3. Fear of Getting It Wrong

What if my memory isn’t accurate?
What if someone else remembers things differently?

Memoir is about emotional truth, not perfect recall. No one remembers every detail with 100% accuracy. Instead of worrying about whether every fact is correct, focus on capturing the heart of the moment. Readers connect with how it felt more than the exact details.

4. Fear of Vulnerability and Exposure

Am I really ready to share this part of my life?
What if people see me differently after reading my story?

Writing a memoir is like standing in the spotlight—without a script. It’s deeply personal. But remember: your first draft is for you. No one ever has to see it until you’re ready. You control what you share and how you share it.

5. Fear of Failure or Not Being "Good Enough"

Who am I to write a memoir?
What if no one cares? What if I can’t finish?

This is the fear that keeps so many writers stuck. But here’s the truth: every writer starts somewhere. The only way to get better is to keep writing. Perfection is not the goal—persistence is.

From Fear to Freedom

What if, instead of resisting fear, you got curious about it?

What if fear wasn’t something to eliminate, but something to listen to—a sign that you’re stepping into something meaningful?

Writing your story is an act of courage. Fear may still show up, but it doesn’t get to make the decisions. You do.

So take a deep breath, put pen to paper, and write the story only you can tell.

Your story matters. And the world needs it.

Want to break free of fear and write more courageously? Join my free Write Your Own Life Facebook group. You'll find a supportive creative community of fellow writers doing the brave work of telling their stories.